Wednesday, January 9, 2013

Hello Goodbye

No,no. Not the Beatles Song, although I do love me some Beatles! This post is a little late, but I was in the hospital on New Year's Day! It wasn't exactly how I planned to spend my new year's eve, but nonetheless, here is my intended blog. I love New Year's. Like seriously, love it. There is something so bittersweet and exciting about flipping the page on one year and beginning another. In one sense, I am so sad to see a year gone. The older I get, the faster a year goes. But there is something so satisfying about looking back on a year - the good moments, the sad moments, the frustrating moments, the "whatever" moments that you have experienced and knowing that God brought you to and through those moments. It's satisfying to look back on where you started at the beginning of that year and know that you have come so far, changed so much, experienced so much and are wiser for it. It's exciting to see a new year before you, like a blank slate. That year is just waiting to be written. You can fill those pages with anything you want. So much can happen in a year....this just might be the year when God will answer your prayer, change you situation, and heal what has long been the thorn in your side. This just might be THAT year. And that is exciting! There is so much hope in not having the answer to the details of your days, but in knowing the ONE who holds each of those details. I may be sitting here at the end of 2013, with the same prayers, the same unfulfilled desires, the same questions. Or....maybe i will have a whole different set of prayers, desires, and questions. I really don't know where I will be at the end of this year. But, I know the ONE who will still be holding it all together at the end of this year. He will be the same, even if I am not. His goodness will not have changed. He will still be my Savior and He will still be the anchor that holds. Through all the ups and downs this year, I will change. I hope at the end of 2013, I will be able to say that He has answered some prayers that I have prayed for a really long time. I hope that at the end of this year I will find myself wiser and more at peace. I want to be a gentler, kinder, deeper person at the end of this year. As I seek Him, I truly believe those things will happen. To achieve those things, I know it will come at a price that I may not be willing to pay. But, He will be there. He will be the rock at the bottom of my pit. He will be the joy at the end of my rainbow. He will be. And that is worth running full force into 2013 for!